How many times do we find ourselves thinking about something that we regretted doing shortly after.
If we could only turn back time, how much would we change. How much would we crop out, filter, or just completely rewrite. Make it all perfect, or if not, bearable to remember. Letting go of the past is easier said than done, especially if something continues to haunt us from its blurred depths.
But it’s necessary. It’s necessary to reconcile, it’s necessary to forgive, it’s necessary to accept. Running away won’t do the trick. It will just make our past reshape itself and take space in our present. Or worse, it’ll disappear until it hits us straight in the face with the force of a freight train.
But reality is that it’s all imaginary. We should be armed and prepared, or these kind of thoughts will always come back. Nurturing the belief that the past can’t hurt us will help. Also because it really won’t in the end, just in the quantity you let it. What matters is the now, nothing else. The past or the future are just not there, assuming time is a real thing and we could talk about a straight line progressing relentlessly. If time is a construct, then it won’t really matter, as long as you decide so. Everything is in your power. Accept and let go.
Tomorrow is not a promise. It’s just not. Either that inspires you or it scares you.
It’s the only certainty in life.
Wealth, money, things are certainly valuable. But our time is precious. Don’t squander it on social obligations you don’t care about. Don’t waste it on negative people who are only capable of throwing shade. Even better, if you don’t like someone, it’s ok to tell them you don’t, you’ll probably end up both saving much valuable time to spend on things you DO love and enjoy, or with people you really care about.
Tomorrow is not a promise, so take time to enjoy your today. Working your ass off without rest and play will just make your life miserable. Work to live, don’t live to work.
If you’re not happy or are feeling stuck, don’t wait for a favourable moment to take action. It might simply never come. Take the vision of your ideal life and try to blend it with the reality you’re living, and strive for it while keeping in mind that it’s the journey itself that’ll make the goal valuable. Maybe you’ll even get there and realize it wasn’t even what you were looking for in the first place, or maybe you’ll just change goals or perspective as you progress.
So just enjoy the now.
“All work and no play makes Jack a dull boy”. Very dull, I might say.
In this day and age, social media has a huge impact on our lives. So much so that more often than not when we’re thumbing down our feed we tend to forget that what we see isn’t reality.
Or at least, not all of it. We compare ourselves to others, and the effects are heartbreaking, especially if we’re already having the blues.
Comparing your crappy day with awesome parties,cocktails,tropical beaches and celebrities’ lives is awful, so we feed on the belief that other people have carefree lives and are so much better off than us, when what we see on social media is just but a tiny fraction of the puzzle.
You ‘ll be comparing your worst days with the highlights of someone’s life. You won’t see the struggles, the crying and burdens that each of us carry. No one is exempt from them, and nobody is supposed to.
Life doesn’t start at the end of the struggles. Life IS the struggle, and that’s just the beauty of it. So if you need to, turn off your social media. Whereas if you can handle the (fake) pressure of having to live the perfect life, stay tuned, but remember that the grass is greener on the other side because you really have no means of stomping on the neighbour’s grass to assest that, and you shouldn’t.
Your life will increase tenfold when you start worrying about your own lawn and spreading the seeds of love on every fellow human you encounter, instead of trying to emulate an already fake version of someone else.
WANT TO BE HAPPIER?
Just call 0783.. just kidding.
Take some paper and pen and note down 5 things you are grateful for. Or 10, 20, 50.
No really. Grab a pen and start writing things you know make you happy, whatever the are. It may sound cheesy and a bit obvious, but the truth is that happiness is a mindset and as such, you want to tune in to it and start thinking about happy things.
I know it’s just a temporary feeling and before you know it, you’ll be back wondering about the things that upset you. But sooner or later, you will have to break the cycle. So take action, carve your gratefulness on the first blank sheets you encounter.
Happiness, by the way, isn’t meant to last long. But is it supposed to? Would it have the same meaning without pain and suffering, or would life be a big meaningless smile before the unknown engulfs us for eternity?
Truth is, it does not matter, really. What matters is the now, and if in this moment you are not feeling happy, you should start looking for the positive in your life.
People who aren’t happy with what they have can’t be happy with what they could have. A shift in focus is much needed if happiness is to be obtained, and it starts by appreciating what is around us, what we do have. Many find happiness in the pursuit itself of “more stuff” or a better life, but I am just content with all the things that happened, are happening, and embrace the future with all its downfalls and its silver linings.
What are you grateful for?
Surely you must be already missing the heat, walking on the beach, drinking cold drinks and celebrating your hard-earned tan. Summer is all nice and good, but before you start suffering until the next time you dive in cristal clear waters, you have to learn to appreciate every season.
So, here are 5 things that you will find fascinating about winter:
1. THE PERFECT EXCUSE:
This one is the most obvious, but at the same time the most rewarding: bad weather is the perfect excuse for staying indoors and sleep in.
2. SWEET FANTASY:
I do not know about you, but winter for me is chocolate season: it syles perfectly with the weather and really gives me that christmasy feeling. Just perfect.
Going outside and feeling the fresh cold wind on your face. Priceless. Sure, provided you have warm clothes on, and are not freezing your boots off. 🙂
Or just staying indoors all day. In your pijamas. 😉
Lying in front of the chimney and having a good read. Or just relaxing in front of the heater!
Paradise, right? Or am I just over fantasizing? Let me know in the comment section below 🙂
Life was created to be lived happily. But more often than not, we happen to think that we do not deserve to live a happy life and be happy. We should instead understand that happiness is a choice. It is not something that happens to us or something which we cannot control or have any influence on.
To reach happiness, we must first acknowledge the fact that our thoughts and actions have an enourmous power on how we feel: for this very reason we must modify our actions and schemes of thought that go against our well-being. Here are 5 quick and easy steps that will jumpstart your quest for happiness:
Find pleasure wherever you go. It does not matter if circumstaces are good or bad: create your very own pleasures. Start and finish by catering to yourselves. Be agile receptors of all the delicious things this life can offer.
Seek happiness with other people, get them involved. The smallest of gestures can suffice, a smile, a compliment, a kind gesture… Play!
3. FORGET THE DRAMA:
Do not make a fuss out of everything that happens to you. Quit focusing on the negatives, the self-pitying and seeking people’s approval and understanding. Also quit giving too much to others, and give it to yourselves. Before anything, fill your own empty spaces. And while you do that, quit listening to bad news, even that of the media that have nothing to do with you. Nothing can stop the drama, if not trying to shut it down. Drama based on fear does not bring happiness about.
4. FIND TRANQUILITY:
Sit and breathe the quietness in. It may seem strange at the beginning, but the more you do it the more you will be able to connect with yourselves. The more you will understand yourselves, the less needy you will feel, because tranquility can bring you the peace you seek, which is fundamental for reaching happiness.
5. FORGET ABOUT THE OUTCOMES:
Believing that things ought to be done in a certain way or constantly waiting for the right moment to be happy, can steer you even more off from reaching your goal. You may feel that happiness is dictated by your current situation. You may think that for being happy you must have an end goal, the reaching of which will bring you happiness. But if you keep waiting for the right time, it will remain difficult to reach. Happiness is not the final destination, but the very journey that brings you towards it. Stress and disappointments are caused by expectations: reassest yours and determine if they are realistic or not. Ask yourselves why you keep holding onto them. This way it will be easier to let go and be happy.
It does not matter who you are or where you come from, we have all experienced hard times in our lives. Music has always proven to be an extremely powerful outlet for all kinds of emotions, helping people from all walks of life get through, deal with or meditate on difficult situations and circumstances, or just lifting their spirits up and cheer up.
So if you are experiencing bad times or just need a pick-me-up, here are 5 songs to help you cope and move on:
1. “Move Along” – The All-American Rejects
- carrying on even when you are tired
- not giving up
2. “Fight song”- Rachel Platten
- Fighting for and taking ownership of your life
- Believing in yourself even when no one else does
3. “Never too late” – Three Days Grace
- turning things around
- it is never too late to change
4. “Let it be” – The Beatles
- times of trouble and spirituality
- words of wisdom
- letting things flow
5. “Human” – Christina Perri
- being vulnerable
- falling apart
Gained any strength yet? 🙂 I hope you did. Keep on fighting, living, loving and carrying on as the daily warrior that you are.
What do you think? What are you top 5 go-to songs to regain momentum? Do let me know in the comment section below 🙂
Lack of motivation is one of the main sources of stress and one of the most insidious hurdles we have to face when it comes to reaching our goals. It hinders our productivity from the very bottom, turning the simplest of tasks into a complete nightmare. Beacuse of this, I have chosen 5 quotes that will keep you motivated!
1. “Don’t watch the clock; see what it does. Keep going.” – Sam Levenson
2. “When you feel like quitting: think about why you started” – Author Unkown
3. “The pessimist sees difficulty in every opportunity. The optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty.” – Winston Churchill
4. “Believe you can and you’re halfway there.” – Theodore Roosevelt
5. “It always seems impossible until it’s done.” – Nelson Mandela
That is it. These are just five of the many worth the share, so do comment if you have any other that resonates with you and that you would like to see added to the list 🙂
We change constantly, and it is a beautiful, beautiful thing. But too often we are taught to fear it.
We declare things such as “don’t change me” or, “you either love me or hate me”, defining ourselves in black and white and giving our own self definitions and limitations. We put up walls and push back on the fear of losing ourselves. We are mistaken: we are never losing ourselves, and that change in perspective can help us deal better with an aspect of our lives that really and ultimately serves us well.
We should be constantly growing, shifting into better versions of ourselves. “If you knew better, you would do better” is a quote I have read quite some time ago and I believe it to be so true: we owe it to ourselves to let go of the things and ideas that keep us stuck and give permission to do so.
But change does not necessarily mean losing our traditions or moral compass. On the contrary, it is the natural flow of life and only by changing our attitudes towards it can we let ourselves evolve. In reality, change is there even in the most static times of our lives, when there seem to be no big events happening or big accomplishments to celebrate, even by just a change in our thoughts or knowledge. We just need to recognize and accept it as an inevitable part of this process called life.
Short answer: be selfish. Why, you might ask? Is not life better when shared and when you give yourself to others? If you put it that way, then yes the short answer would be to be selfless. But bear with me.
Since our childhood, we are educated to believe that you can only be happy when you say Yes to others: children are brought up to donate, to always smile, be kind and be the best form of human possible in the world. But the reality of the matter is that by always saying Yes you might make things smoother for a while, whereas in the long run you are solely and ultimately saying No to your needs, hopes and dreams.
I am by no means saying that you should then go ahead and neglect every request, challenge everyone else’s plans and just be overall rude. There was a time when I was extremely selfish and focused only on my well being as a survival tactic; broken farewells, sleepless nights and utter regrets in a steep falling spiral towards self destruction. A few steps down the road, and I am still selfish, just in a different, more healthy way.
To be selfless, you need to be selfish. There’s a difference between the simple availability to donate, and being able to listen, be altrustic, and give to your own accord. Sometimes even arguing is healthier if that ends up in a better understanding of both parties’ needs. In fact, being always available 24/7 will just increase your frustration and with time it will turn into a feeling of suffocation, the kind that feels as though you were running out of air. Building healthy relationships and finding your own path are not possible if you ignore yourself to please others, so please do listen to your guts and just go with the flow.
This is just my two cents on this topic, but I am sure I have left many interesting points out. But do go on and have some selfish, indulging, treat yourself time.